what i want to learn;

i want to learn how to except myself for who i am. i know i can't be taught this, but it's something i need to do.
i have the lowest self confidence. i just want to be happy with myself and find someone who loves me for me.
i'm afraid i'll be alone forever.


as far as school goes, i want to learn to speak fluent spanish.

I remember the times we spent together
All those drives, we had a million questions
All about our lives
And when we got to New York everything felt right
I wish you were here with me,
Tonight
I remember the days we spent together,
Were not enough, and it used to feel like dreaming
Except we always woke up,
Never thought not having you here now
Would hurt so much
Tonight I've fallen and I can't get up
I need your loving hands to come and pick me up
And every night I miss you
I can just look up
And know the stars are
Holding you, holding you, holding you
Tonight
I remember the time you told me
About when you were eight
And all those things you said that night
That just couldn't wait
I remember the car you were last seen in
And the games we would play
All the times we spilled our coffees
And stayed out way too late
I remember the time you sat and told me
About your Jesus, and how not to look back
Even if no one believes us
When it hurts so bad, sometimes
Not having you here

silent beats;

the film silent beats, i felt that people make judgments against people due to stereotypes. the Asian guy was all worried that the African American kid was gonna steal or rob him or something because they have a reputation. but it's not like all African Americans steal or are criminals. just like in the film that old lady stole some candy bars. & she' was afraid of the African American boy & she was the one stealing!
i just think it's dumb that people judged that boy and they didn't even know what he was going through.

do you make judgements about people because of certain stereotypes?

grading period;

this first grading period went pretty well. i've got good grades & i'm glad it's over.
this is my favorite class though, i've come to realise that.

SWOT analysis;

how i study:
                i study alone while listening to music.

STRENGTHS: I don't have anyone to bother me. at all. it's great. i get the 'muse' of music. it keeps me on track.
WEAKNESSES: I don't have the opportunity to work in a group; i lack social skills.
OPPORTUNITY: i get to mulitask. it's a new way to learn things.
THREATS: IPod could die. get distracted by songs i don't like. don't remember things i learn. too focused on music rather than work.

a year from now;

Complete and total adoration,
My gift to you, my heart was yours.
In ten weeks you shaped it,
In one night you murdered it.
Torn from my chest and laid at your feet,
That first step you took was the worst.
Since then you've walked a thousand miles in silence and short remark,
I still have these memories,
But we'll never see what we could have been.
Remember when we talked about where we'd be a year from now?
Remember when you held my hand like you'd never let it go?
Remember, cause that's all you can do.
We'll never make another memory,
I wish I'd have died in your arms the last time we were together,
So I wouldn't have to wake without you today.
This time I thought things were real.
You said they were, what happened?
You were a priority, was I an option?
I let you see a side of me that I don't share with anyone.
Promises are just words unless they are fulfilled.
you knew from the beginning all I had to offer you was my heart,
I'm sorry that wasn't enough.
So, we'll go our own ways,
And hopefully you'll remember the things I've told you,
Hopefully you'll understand that everything I said was in sincerity.
A broken heart is not what I wanted from this,
But I guess I've learned from it.
But aren't you supposed to learn from your mistakes?
I don't consider this a mistake,
I just wish the story didn't end this way,
Cause I'm still in love with the person who helped me write it.